It’s natural to go into labour with an idea of what you want your birth to look like. Whether you’ve dreamed of a water birth, planned for delayed cord clamping, or prefer minimal intervention, writing a birth plan—or what we prefer to call birth preferences—is a valuable step in preparing for your baby’s arrival.
At Beloved Bumps, we strongly support the idea of documenting your preferences. Having a written plan allows your care team to understand what matters most to you and helps them support you in achieving the birth you hope for. It opens communication and sets the tone for respectful, personalised care.
But here’s the truth we always share in our prenatal classes: birth doesn’t always follow the plan.
And that’s okay.
Our bodies—and babies—don’t always read the script. Labour can be unpredictable, and sometimes unexpected things come up that require a change of course. The important thing is not whether your birth followed your plan to the letter, but whether you felt heard, informed, and part of the decision-making process throughout.
That’s why in our classes, we explore all types of birth: unmedicated, epidural, assisted delivery, caesarean, and everything in between. Not because we expect you to go through each one—but so that if a new option is presented on the day, you’ll feel confident, not confused. You’ll know what it means, what questions to ask, and how to be part of the discussion.
Being informed empowers you. Asking questions, understanding your options, and feeling like a valued member of the team can make all the difference in how you experience your birth. We know that birth trauma can occur when people feel that things were done to them—when decisions were made without explanation or consent. That’s why we focus so much on education and shared decision-making: because this is your baby, your birth, and your body.
You have every right to be supported in achieving the birth experience you want.
At the same time, it’s also okay to feel sadness if things didn’t go as hoped. It is entirely possible to say, “I had a positive birth experience,” and still grieve the birth you didn’t get. Two things can be true. If you’re struggling to process parts of your experience, please know you’re not alone—and don’t hesitate to reach out. Talking to someone can be incredibly helpful in making sense of it all.
So, write your birth preferences. Talk to your partner. Ask questions. Be open. And remember: being flexible and informed doesn’t mean giving up control—it means stepping into birth with confidence, no matter how your baby arrives.
